Wednesday, February 23, 2011

Dear Gaga.

Dear Lady Gaga,

While I really hate to admit that I purchased that Fame Monster album of yours, I will, because there really is nothing like singing along to "Monster" while I'm in traffic in the car. I mean, I'm all married now, and I have to live in the 'burbs. So, I have to listen to something totally mindless, and that's where you come in.

The thing is, as much as I enjoy getting all cozy with you and your completely stupid lyrical content, I have to express my recent distaste with your diva high horse you seem to have climbed on. Why? Oh, I don't know. It could have something to do with the fact that I turned on the radio one morning and caught a remix of Madonna's "Express Yourselfff..."

...WAIT. Hold up. Just. Wait. It was NOT Madonna! It was YOU, Gaga! It was you, singing your "new song" that you "wrote in ten minutes!" Well, of course, the song just came right to you. Because you stole it from Madonna! I mean, since when are you this delusional to think the population of thirty-somethings who once worshipped Madonna like your fans worship you now wouldn't catch on that you're trying to reincarnate Madonna circa 1989 to Gaga 2011?!

For someone who prides themselves on being the next "new" thing, you should be ashamed. Great mathematicians took existing formulas and expounded upon them to "level up" their trade. You...well, it seems you are just a copycat. Tsk, tsk. Respect. Lost.

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